farewell

This is what I worked on yesterday when Milo was napping. Yep, instead of packing, I made this super cheesy video.

Why?

Well, for one, sappy music and photo montages are my love language.

And also it felt good to reflect on four years here.

To think about all the trails we have hiked, the friends we have made, and the baby we birthed. Oh yeah, and we got some degrees too.

We are making the right decision to move. I'm sure of it. I'll be glad to be "home."

But, saying new hellos requires saying goodbyes first. And making this video helped me do that.

So, here it is. Our "life in Denver"......

I heart you, colorado. it's nothing personal.

Well, the moving truck is reserved.

In 19 days we will pack our stuff, our dogs, and our baby into a car and drive out of Colorado.

It's bittersweet, really.

I'm excited to live closer to family again. (And we will be living CLOSE. Like my mom's basement until we find a place of our own.)

I'm excited to have extra hands and extra laps for Milo. I'm happy he'll live so close to his rockin' grandparents. I'm excited to be reunited with friends we left 4 years ago.

But, I'm sad.

Denver is our home. KC is where we are from. It's where we grew up. But, right now, in this very moment, Denver is our home.

It's where I went to school. And met new friends. And learned so many new things about myself. And the world.

It's where David found a job in a hospital that loves him. They nurtured him as he became a nurse.

It's where our church is. No, our membership isn't at Trinity. But Trinity is our church. It's the place that nurtured me as I grew in faith development and leadership.

And, it's where we became a family. We love, love, love our extended family. (If we didn't, we wouldn't be moving!) But Colorado is where we learned to be a family of two. And then a family of three. We learned to rely on each other. We grew up together. We became parents together.

Not to mention how much we love Colorado.

Like, SO love Colorado.

Have I told you that Colorado has awesome weather? And like zero humidity? And like zero bugs? And we are 30 minutes from the mountains???

*Sigh*

If motherhood has taught me anything, it is that most of life is both/and. Motherhood is BOTH incredibly rewarding AND incredibly frustrating. It is BOTH exhausting AND exhilarating.

Both. And.

At the same time.

And, so I guess, this move is also that way.

Both the end of our chapter here in Denver and the beginning of a new chapter in KC.

Both exciting and gut-wrenching.

Both. And.

All of it heaped up in one big messy pile.

I started this blog as a way to keep in touch with our Kansas families. Now, I suppose, it will be a good way to keep in touch with our Colorado families.

It won't be called "Life in Denver" anymore. And that makes me sad.

And happy.

Both.

And.

I seriously heart you, Colorado. You will be missed...

"how to teach your parents a very important lesson" by milo baker

Yesterday my parents decided to take me hiking.

And I decided to teach them a lesson.

They wanted to "get outside" on a beautiful, Colorado day. They said I had to come too since Midas and Zoe are unreliable babysitters.

I tried to play along.

I woke up happy.

I entertained myself with my rock-n-crawl ball while they packed the car.

I giggled and played with my toes on the 45-minute drive to the mountains.

Mom & Dad put me in the hiking backpack.

I looked adorable.

I even acted interested in the "wildlife." (Mom & Dad got all excited showing me the squirrels. Um, hello dummies, we have those in our backyard.)

But, then I got tired.

Really, really tired.

I tried to tell my parents I was tired. But they kept hiking.

I started crying.

Hard.

My dad said something to my mom like "I didn't really think the trail was this long."

And my mom said something to my dad like "I can't believe we left his pacifier in the car."

Seriously, these people are allowed to raise me?

I cried and cried and cried.

My mom tried to nurse me on a rock by the trail. But that wasn't what I wanted.

I cried super loud into my dad's ear, but he kept walking. Really fast. At one point, I could no longer feel my mom following behind us. It's a miracle we didn't lose her.

I finally convinced my dad to take me out of the stupid backpack and carry me like a normal person. When people passed us, they laughed at us. My dad carrying me. My mom carrying the ginormous (and now empty) backpack carrier. And me, crying. I didn't care. I kept crying.

We finally made it back to the car. I fell asleep before we even made it down the mountain.

I don't think we'll be hiking again any time soon.

Because that, my friends, is how I taught my parents a very important lesson.

Don't ever, EVER mess with my nap time.

Ever.

saturday

boys.

baby.

boy in berries.

boxes of berries.

farm.

fall.

family.

"How I spent my weekend." By Milo Baker

I picked apples with Mom and Dad. (Except it's too late in apple picking season to get any good ones. Dad found two.)

I went to the Royal Gorge. (Except it's $25 a person to walk across the bridge. My mom and dad are cheap skates so we just took pictures from a distance.)

I went to Georgetown for the Aspen Fest. (The trees were pretty but there was too much traffic on the way back to Denver. I got hungry. I cried.)

The end.

a weekday getaway

We only have one income. (Ok, TECHNICALLY I have an income but it barely covers our monthly diaper expenses...)

One income means there are lots of things we DON'T do.

(Sometimes I dream about the things I would do with disposable income...hair cut! highlights! pedicure! massage! new pants...with a zipper!)

BUT, only having one income means we have something really, really big.

TIME.

David works three days a week. I work 6 hours a week. Which means a.) we get to spend a LOT of time with our awesome dude, Milo and b.) we can go to Breckenridge on a Wednesday.

Which we did. And we had a blast.

Milo's First Hike

labor day

a free day at...

denver botanic gardens...

with this guy...

and this guy...

plus eating grilled veggies on our patio...

plus roses David picked for me from our backyard...

equals the best labor day ever.

My 29th Birthday

Sunday was my birthday.

We are excited for Baby Baker to arrive but we decided that, since our weekends of picking up and going somewhere are coming to an end (or at least a hiatus), we would pack the car for the day and head to Vail.

I had never been before and David had only been in the winter but it was BEAUTIFUL! The weather was perfect. There was a farmer's market so the streets were packed with local vendors selling baked goods, homemade soap, and beaded bracelets. There was even a steel rim band!

We walked along Gore Creek to the gondola ride, which took us to the top of Vail Mountain. The views were fantastic and we ate lunch at the top. Even at 37 weeks, I was able to hike around a little bit and it felt great to be moving and active.

Sunday evening we headed to City Park Jazz with some friends. Even though it had been hot all day, the evening weather was perfect and cool AND I didn't get a single mosquito bite. (Oh, how I love Denver...)

I enjoyed celebrating with our Colorado family, but I felt the love from our Kansas family as well. Thanks for the phone calls, texts, and cards! =)

P.S. I hesitated to put up the pictures because I look huge, hot, and tired in all of them but decided that was just part of turning 29 this year. Here's hoping that I look more like myself at 30!

Time to Party!

Once graduation was over, it was time to party! Saturday we headed to Colorado Springs and visited Garden of the Gods and Seven Falls.

Saturday night we had a party at our new house. David grilled burgers and we had LOTS of yummy food (thanks to my mom, Patty, Lauren, and Greta). Hooray for parties!

Eat. Pray. Love.

The 3 things I did last weekend: Eat. Pray. Love.

We stayed at the Retreat House at the Abbey of St. Walburga in Virginia Dale, Colorado (almost in Wyoming). The nuns were extremely hospitable and cooked us delicious meals that we ate family style. There was an abundance of hot tea and cocoa available whenever we needed it--which was good since we were numb from the cold most of the weekend!

We prayed 6 times with the nuns during the 24 hours we were there. While I admire their faithfulness, I learned the monastic lifestyle is certainly NOT for me. Especially when the alarm went off at 4:15 a.m. for morning prayers!!!

However, I did enjoy the evening prayers last night and the silence of having my own room to read, pray, and of course, nap. =)

I did some reading about St. Benedict and the Rule of Benedict (St. Walburga is a Benedictine community) and one of the "nuggets" that sticks with me is the following:

If you listen, you will hear what your heart would like to say. One thing stays with us always, present whether pursued or not, and that is the call to the center of ourselves where the God we are seeking is seeking us.

In addition to eating and praying, I was able to soak up a lot of love from three dear friends who were also on the retreat, as well as enjoy some love from older women in my church community. Oh, how I love being part of a church!

AND, I think Bambeano loved being there because s/he was moving a lot! I'm really starting to love that kid...

Birthday Weekend in Keystone

Since David is turning 30 next week, we decided this birthday celebration should be special. We headed to the mountains on Friday and spent two nights at the Inn at Keystone. Our friends drove up on Saturday so the boys could ski with David and the girls could keep this big-bellied gal company at the outlets.

Keystone is only an hour away but it felt like a real retreat from our hectic lives in Denver. We had a great time celebrating a REALLY awesome man! =)

Retreat Weekend

This weekend I got to go on retreat with the women's group at Trinity. We spent two days and two nights up at Snow Mountain Ranch (near Winter Park) and it was WONDERFUL! 

There were 41 of us and I rode up with Lee and Jennifer. (Two women from the Young Adults group) We were divided between two retreat cabins to sleep but met together for meals and large group sessions. 

Saturday was our only full day and it started early with morning prayers. The worship leader was India, the wife of a retired pastor, and all of her worship materials were written by J. Phillip Newell and Joyce Rupp. (I'll write more about them later!) We had a group session in the morning and then we could choose from the various breakout sessions that were offered. I chose to do the labyrinth with India. 

We did a mini pilgrimage walk to the labyrinth and then she led us in a body prayer before we walked it. The body prayer used movements from Tai Chi and as we did each movement, India spoke aloud the prayer. It was beautiful! I had tears in my eyes because it felt like such a holy, sacred experience. There was something really magical about being in the mountains, in a circle of women, praying with my body, thanking God for God's blessings, and praying for courage, wisdom, and strength. The way the movements worked, when we used our left side, we were praying for ourselves and when we used our right side we were praying for the world. We extended our arms to the sky, held them close to our body, and then extended them wide. It was an embodied way to express the way we receive from God, recognize God's presence and activity in our own life, and then extend God's goodness to the world around us. 

That afternoon we had a lot of free time so I did some yoga with Lee, got a chair massage, and took a nap. Saturday night we ate dinner by candlelight and enjoyed each other's company!

The theme of the weekend was "Pathways through Transition" and the retreat leader had us do a lot of reflection on the transitions in our lives. She compared the experience of transition to the biblical experience in the wilderness. She reminded us of the wandering that the Israelites did in the wilderness for 40 years before they entered the Promised Land and she suggested that the time in the wilderness was less about getting the Israelites out of Egypt and more about getting Egypt out of the Israelites. 

We talked a lot about how uncomfortable it can be to be in transition. We spent time in conversation with each other sharing what resources help us when we are in transition. We were given time to journal and encouraged to reflect on these three questions: What is it time to let go of in your life? What is unlived in your life? What is waiting in the wings of your life to "come on stage?" 

It was a really wonderful weekend. Not only was I given a respite in the midst of our chaotic lives to reflect and journal, but I got to meet and know some incredible women who "loved me up," nurtured me, and encouraged me. It was a real experience of community! 

Here are a couple of "nuggets" from this weekend that I wanted to share:

Ring the bells that still can ring 

Forget your perfect offering 

There is a crack in everything

That's how the light gets in. 

--L. Cohen

What will you do with your one wild and precious life? 

--Mary Oliver

Every time you listen with great attentiveness to the voice that calls you the Beloved,

you will discover within yourself a desire to hear that voice longer and more deeply.

--Henri Nouwen

Become aware of what is in you.

Announce it,

pronounce it,

produce it,

and give birth to it.

--Meister Eckhart

If God the Great Creator has used the medium of chaos before, then what is God creating out of the present chaos of my life?

Life does not accommodate you, it shatters you.

Every seed destroys its container or else there would be no fruition. 

Be patient towards all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. 

Then gradually you will live into the answers. 

--Rainer Maria Rilke

Steve and Patty's Visit

To have family that loves you is just about the greatest thing in the world. Enough said. =)

Our Farewell to Summer

David is done with clinicals for the quarter so we took an impromptu trip to Dillon, Colorado. Dillon is about 60 miles outside Denver and, in my opinion, PERFECT for camping. 

We arrived early afternoon at Heaton Bay Campground near Dillon Lake. David found an empty site near the water and we set up camp. (Ok, mostly David set up camp but I helped. I LOVE being married to a boyscout!) 

It was lovely. We took the dogs for a hike along the shore. We played cards at the picnic table. We read by the water while the dogs chewed their bones. We drank beer by the fire that David built. AND, the BEST part about camping at Heaton Bay is that the town of Dillon is only 5 minutes away so we ate fish tacos at a local Mexican restaurant for dinner and got Starbucks for breakfast! 

We were gone less than 24 hours, but it was wonderful to get away together and a fabulous farewell to summer. =) 

David's 14er

Yesterday David went with our friend, Matt, and hiked a 14er. (A peak that is higher than 14,000 feet) They hiked Mt. Antero and took some incredible pictures!